Cold

... in more ways than one. I'm sitting here trying to remember the last few workouts I've had and my brain feels like its filled with mush. Okay, its slowly coming back to me now.
Two Saturdays ago, we met at Crossroads in Oakley. It was a cut back week as I mentioned before, so we were only running 6 miles. According to the coach's e-mail, it was a "flat" course. After that run I would beg to differ. It was pretty tough and I pushed myself hard. Lindsay was there and had brought here sister along, so they were going more slowly and chatting with a guy named Tony who Lindsay met when she was at the store buying shoes. If I may digress for a moment, I was taken back to my high school days, when my "best" friend seemed to get every guy I had a crush on. Okay, so now I am married and I hadn't even met this Tony guy, but I was annoyed. Why can't I get over it? I have a lot more self confidence since I started running and lost a lot of weight, but the echoes of doubt are still there in my head, telling me I am fat and unattractive. On top of that, I am a naturally introverted person, so making friends is just not my forte. As hard as it is for outgoing people to understand, it is really difficult for me to talk to anyone that I dont' know. But anyway, I don't want to psychoanalyze myself (I've spent plenty of time doing that already.) I ran ahead of those three and spent most of my run asking myself why I needed this validation from someone else - why do I really care if men notice me or not? I'm married, it shouldn't matter. I never came up with a good answer, but I shared those feelings with my mom who seemed to think it was because of the deep hurt I experienced when I was in high school. Who knows... at least I think I am over it now.
So, things were going well last week, except for getting to the gym for Sunday spinning only to find out that the class was already full even thought I was 15 minutes early. Seriously, when are these people going to lose their resolve and leave? Maybe I underestimated them. I was really logging the miles last week. Monday 5.5, Wednesday 5.7, Thursday 3, and this past Saturday was scheduled to be 9. That would have put me at about 23 miles last week, but my body had other plans.
Last Wednesday we did a negative split run from the Running Spot. I was feeling tired and the weather was so cold, and I almost convinced myself to skip the workout, but I went. I felt terrible. My negative split workout turned into positive splits. I had to stop and walk on the way back because I felt nauseous and just generally not good. Overtraining... the word kept bouncing around in my head, but it didn't jive because I've been working out hard and continously since November. On Thursday I dragged myself to the gym and did three miles on the treadmill, once again feeling like my legs were made of stone. I looked forward to Friday - a rest day, and a day I would also be working at home. By Friday afternoon my throat was hurting I was just feeling bad all over.
By the time I went to bed that night, I had accepted the fact that I was sick, and a nine mile run was out of the question. I spent almost all weekend on the couch feeling depressed, because I had to get sick on a weekend with perfect running weather - sunny and 40 degrees. Today I am feeling somewhat better, but still not good, so I think I am going to rest tonight. Even though I am in denial about overtraining, that could have something to do with catching a cold (can cause a weakend immune system. I also got sick after the C-bus marathon.) Hopefully I will be in good shape to work out on Wednesday. I hate missing workouts. For now, I'm popping some prescription decongestants and Zicam, and occupying my mind with contemplating whether or not to sign up for the Chicago marathon again this year. This cold is definitely getting to my brain.